Hi @Louis41 welcome to the community!
Getting on the same page as your spouse is always super important. Usually finding a point in the middle (aka compromise) is a good start. Communication is key. Find out why she is reluctant (is it fear, its frivolous, etc) or is she just “meh” on the concept of firearms. Not everyone loves to goto the range and there’s nothing wrong with that.
I’ll list a couple of other threads here with content that may help.
Sometimes, a spouse (especially if small-statured) may not like shooting duty calibers (9mm, .45, etc). You may not have any problem handling recoil but they might due to either strength or technique. In that case, every range trip is just “unpleasant” and you’ll find any excuse to not go. So maybe a smaller caliber pistol/rifle like a good .22LR can make shooting “fun” and then squeeze in a mag of a duty caliber so they are comfortable using the home defense weapon if needed.
I haven’t had to convince my spouse about firearms in regards to defense, but I do live in a low-crime area and have had the “why do you carry here its totally safe” conversation with a few folks. It goes something like this:
although the risk around here is very low, the risk is never zero . And if I only carried when it’s likely that I need it then I’d never carry, and then when I needed it I probably wouldn’t have it. Because it’s not like I go romping through drug-dealer infested dark alleys where I can say “today I need to carry”. So if I ever need it, I know I have it.
When it comes to mass shootings, by definition they almost always happen where people are not expecting to be attacked. Our churches, places of work, our schools, our theaters. I absolutely will not be one of those people cowering behind a desk waiting to die.
And then I can even give them a very specific personal example. There was a murder, quasi-famous around here because the murderer fled the country and was later extradited from his country back here to stand trial, and of course I have bookmarked the article(s) from appropriate anti-gun friendly news sources. That murder… happened a few blocks from my house. I used to walk my dogs that way, the wife used to jog that way, I’ve driven past it untold times. So I then re-iterate… around here… while the risk is low … the risk is never zero .
Links to other threads on the same/similar topic: