From a very young age, I always told my daughter that before she could date someone, they had to meet me. My daughter’s 1st boyfriend lasted throughout high school and her first year of College. When he broke up with her, and this is God’s truth, he disappeared for a solid week and wouldn’t tell anyone where he was “because I would be looking for him” (and to be fair, I was). So this past weekend my daughter brings another young man home, to meet me.
Now I have, a few things that I always ask and/or tell
One word answer only. This is a pass/fail question.
What exactly does the word No mean to you?
This is more of a statement than a question.
If you pull into the driveway to pick my daughter up for a date, and you honk your horn. You had better be delivering a pizza. Because the only thing you will be leaving with is the tip I give you for delivering said pizza.
Do you understand the sign on the wall next to you?
It’s the 10 rules for dating my daughter sign, you can pretty much look up on the internet.
I usually wear a t-shirt my daughter gave me. It says
"Yes, I do have a beautiful daughter. I also have a gun, a shovel, and an alibi. Any questions?
The first time I did this my daughter was mortified. What really made it sort of surreal, was the young man’s mother wanted to be there with her 2 daughters to “show them what their Dad was going to do when they started dating”. I asked her if she was really sure, because I am not a nice man when it comes to my daughter? She said “oh yes, my daughter’s need to understand how protective father’s are about their daughter’s”. I told her “ok, but that doesn’t mean I am going to be any less, well me, just because you and your daughters are there”. She said “I understand”.
By the time I was done, she was looking at me with that look you get when you have fallen down and realize you are about a foot away from a coiled up rattlesnake.
Back to new gentleman wanting to date my daughter. I think my daughter brings them over now, just to mess with them.
My daughter gets me and we have the same sense of humor. She will often call me, afterwards, and tell me how the young man reacted.
In case me putting this in humor thread is not enough. This is humor. Do not attempt this at home, this post was crafted by professionals on a closed course. No animals were harmed during the making of this post. Though one of my dogs is giving me the “I need a treat stare”
My daughter always warns boys about me, not her father.
“Mom is a concealed carry and defensive shooting instructor. She’s a first degree black belt and rides a Harley. And she’s fiercely protective of her family.”
One guy is still afraid of me … He’s a second degree black belt, but he knows I know people. Like I would do anything to him to jeopardize my right to carry a firearm. Just not worth it.
I totally get that. I’m not going to do anything to jeopardize what I have in my life, but sometimes it has a certain value for young men to know that the young lady they are dating has someone who is
Watching
Communicates w/ that young lady
Will use every available resource to prosecute any bad behavior
That’s how I plan on being when my daughter dates. One thing to add is that she is an expert marksman (has the competition scores to prove it) so I might suggest they really treat her with respect! Not to mention, she doesn’t take **** from anyone.
My daughter is 13 and I have been telling her for years that she is not allowed to date until after she is married. At first I got a blank stare of confusion and I would say “yup, figure that one out.”
On the other side of the coin, I raised 2 boys. Spent a lot of time warning them about girls, entrapment, etc… They did good.
My new partner, raised 3 boys. Did pretty much the same as I did. Funny thing was one of her sons had this girl a few years ago, was not really a very nice girl shall we say. A picture of her all decked out for 3gun and the girl was gone in a flash…
From the time my daughter was about three, I told her she could date when she was 35 years old or married. Whichever came first. She quickly learned that was mostly humor.
During her high school years, my wife was the “cool mom.” I was the “scary dad.” I’m not really that scary, but if it kept the boys in line, I was all for it.
Last summer, five days after her 26th birthday, my daughter married a youth pastor. He’s a great young man who has now handled a gun twice in his life - the two times I took him to the range. He asks to go when they visit. He’s a better shot than I am.
A buddy of mine and I were both on the Navy Rifle Team back in the day and he was blessed with 3 girls. Me being a handy guy and wood worker I fashioned for him a wooden plaque to hang on the wall with a shelf. On that shelf were 7 “pockets” the exact same size as the base of a 300 Win Mag Cartridge. The center “pocket” was a bit more forward than the other six. There were two dowels set above the height of a loaded 300 WM cartridge which held a grease pen. I included 3 live rounds and 2 fired rounds from our match guns and the grease pen. The 2 fired rounds appeared to have grease pen smudges on them as if a name was written and then the cartridge was fired. I gave it to him via a pile of birthday presents on his oldest daughters 13th birthday (She read the tag and was quite confused when she handed it to him “Dad, this has your name on it?”)
On the fateful day when the first young lad came around there was the “Dad talk” and right before they walked out the door he got up and went to the plaque, took down the grease pen and an unfired cartridge and asked the young lad.
A friend of mine’s father used to invite her dates for a sitdown in the kitchen while she was getting ready. There he’d have a nice conversation with the lad about his interests in school, what he had planned for a career, and his driving record… while playing dominoes with the 12 gauge shells. Stand 'em up… knock 'em down… stand 'em up…
She NEVER missed curfew. Those boys had her home ON TIME
My daughter is 21 and on boyfriend #4. The first time I had “the talk” with #1, I wasn’t sure how it was going to go. Now? I love it. At 6’ and 200 lbs, I’m not a big imposing guy. But to a man, every single one has left the conversation physically shaking. I simply maintain eye contact and calmly lay down the guard rails: 1. My daughter is the most important thing in the world to me; 2. Treat her with respect always, never harm her; 3. If you fail to follow #2, you will deal with me. It’s never failed me.
Also, it never hurts to share your affinity for firearms. As cliche as it sounds, for #3 and #4 I was cleaning my pistols during their initial visit. I’m a measured, conscientious gun owner, almost the Walter Mitty of the concealed carry world. But to them? I’m Rambo.
It’s our duty as fathers to protect our daughters. It’s a duty I cherish.
Started my girls shooting as soon as they could hold their little .22 rifles. That was about 7. When they got to 16, I told them they weren’t allowed to marry anyone who couldn’t shoot better than them. And they’ve always known that we don’t “date for fun” - it’s a “getting to know you” phase that precedes real courtship leading to marriage.
All of the boyfriends see inside my safe (not on the first date, though) and know how fanatical I am about my daughters being treated as someone’s future wife.
And I agree that nothing would happen (unless there’s imminent danger) that would endanger anyone or my legal right to keep and bear. But it sets a tone to the relationship that suits me.
Luckily, I won’t have to deal with this for a few more years since my daughter is 9 and my son is 8, but this thread has given me a few ideas for when I do!
Both of my kids know Daddy carries a firearm at all times and they both know firearm safety, how to shoot rifle, shotgun and pistol and have their own firearms.
My dad was my dad God rest his soul. My mom was the one suitors would have night terrors about. Being German she was at her knees or at your throat. At 97 she recalls the day my sister’s boy friend made the mistake when started his Harley in the middle of the night and woke up the neighborhood. She warned dates that the daughter will be her mother in later life. Enough said LOL…
Like I would do anything to him to jeopardize my right to carry a firearm. Just not worth it.
