More dumb stuff from Cracked. It used to be the edgier version of Mad, back when it was on the magazine racks. Now, the Web site is impossible to use. Too many ads disrupting the text.
Lol, I have an blocker so I never saw them.
My blocker leaves blank spaces in the text that interrupt the flow.
Number 6 is real, if you have a Mil Spec Sig . Sorry, I couldn’t resist.
#7 all gun have an almost endless supply of ammo…(unless they need someone to reload for dramatic effect)
#8 getting shot, as long as it’s “through and through” is no big deal and you can walk it off……
yep, I have to agree that Hollywood Wants You To DIE!
EVERYthing they teach you about guns… designed to help you become dead faster.
Love the article, pretty funny.
I was always pretty fond of watching someone screwing a suppressor onto the front of a revolver.
#9. All handguns make the single action revolver cocking noise, even Glocks.
#10. Regardless of anything else, a pimp shotgun being racked scares every living thing on the planet, and must be done gratuitously.
That reminds me of #11
#11 All semi-auto handguns “click” loudly when you pull the trigger and are out of ammo (and rarely go out of battery)
#12. You always have to Cock a 1911 or Beretta 92.
#13. Previously racked semiauto pistols and pump shotguns must be RE-racked when things Get Real, or when the user gets Seriously Angry. Previous racks are invalid, however the chambered round is never ejected during re-racking… it just becomes more accurate.
I personally think re-racking acts to amplify the round’s power factor and flight accuracy, but have been unable to prove this as all my firearms stubbornly insist on ejecting the chambered round and loading another.
I suspect I am not angry enough when I re-rack to engage this amplification magic. Or maybe I’m not holding my face right.
ooooooohhhhhh. I was wondering about that, I thought maybe per General Patton it had pearl inlays in the receiver (since only pimps carried pearl handled revolvers, his were ivory).
Don’t forget about how lead bullets spark when they ricochet off trees and asphalt!