Hello everyone, I carry concealed most everywhere so I’m all for concealed carry however, my dad is 86, recently scored a 2 out of 5 possible points for cognitive decline and more often than I probably know uses pm medication.
I’m mainly looking for advice from people who have felt with similar issues and am wondering how they approached their parents. I don’t want to be heavy handed but I’m going to have to do something .
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Welcome Donald378. Yes, I know many of us have or have had parents afflicted with a form of dementia.
I remember having to make adjustments, none having to do with firearms, as they did not own one, but other things, like the car keys, driving, home safety for fire prevention, ensuring for their medications, and health care.
Took a village, as best as we could, and trying to remember the good parts, and love.
Seemed it took on our end being proactive, we had to seek out advice, which is ok. Not all were able to offer education, but some. Only certain doctors, neurologists, counselors, local Alzheimers Association. We read up on stuff.
When we had to make changes, we did, it was not easy. I wish I had been more creative with it, so that it did not hurt her as much, as she was sad to lose things she loved.
I imagine everyone’s different. If he owns firearms, I wonder if (via non lethal means) helping to ensure for his safety against violence, or attack, while helping him enjoy his other likes and hobbies might soften the change.
Many of us will also experience cognitive decline when we age. Might help us if we start having those conversations now — with our younger loved ones, on what to do when they see us change.
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@Donald378 Welcome to our community, we are glad to have you with us. 
What Burdo said… It’s not going to be easy so be ready for resistance, if you have siblings, you all need to be on the same page not one playing both ends against the middle.
From an Old SAR Guys perspective, you need to have a Wanderers Information Sheet to give to LE, SAR and Volunteers in case he wanders off.
Here in a PDF you can print off, it’s the same one I used.
Good luck, be firm but show lots of love.
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I was tasked by my family to basically give my Father-In-Law who was diagnosed with dementia, all the bad news like you need to stop driving, I need your guns etc.
It was probably more painful for me than for him. I went out of my way to do it in a loving manner and paint a positive picture to him. When I asked for his keys I told him he’d never be stranded because I wanted to spend more time with him and I’d be there to drive him anywhere he needed to be driven so I could hang out with him more!
When I told him I needed his guns I told him not to worry about a thing because I’d be his body guard and I’d gladly die for him.
He took things better than I expected which taught me it would be better to just deal with bad situations ONLY if/when they came, and stop worrying about stuff that I didn’t know if it was ever going to happen.
This made the years we dealt with his decline a much more positive experience than many other folks have and in the end I have zero regrets because we gave him our best effort to make our time meaningful and happy.
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Agreed based on a recent experience
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Wow, thanks for the sheet. I have already put a apple air tag on his power chair but haven’t thought about this.
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As already mentioned, talk to siblings and family before you go about it. My mom, 84, keeps getting sciatica problems in her back. I Said when I had it, I got needling therapy from PT and it took two weeks for to be gone completely. After the first treatment I could move better and the pain was almost completely gone. She refused and I was adamant she should at least try it once. The whole family came down on me because “it was her body”.
I have dealt with pain like this and worse. Anything to get relief is a blessing. People sue for pain and suffering and get big money because of it. Not saying she will sue me but the elderly can be very stubborn. I have thrown up my hands and said the hell with it. As much as it hurts me to see her like that, I or you can only do so much.
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Your welcome Donald.
You have no idea how much SAR and LEOs will appreciate having the info, also up to date pics and pics of tats or prominent scars.
A video of the person at different distances, sitting, walking and standing is helpful for identifying a person in a crowd or at a distance.
Put the video on an SD card and tape to the sheet. 
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Greetings and welcome, Donald378, we’re very glad that you’ve chosen to join us!
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Welcome @Donald378. Yours is a great question. In our case my mom was in the early stages of Alzheimer’s. While she wasn’t a shooter, my dad was military academy grad and later a big time bird hunter. As a result, there were guns in the house. My dad does have what happens to some at 89 and while he drives, not sure I would want to be the car ahead of him. So, in our case my brother’s and I said that my youngest brother would store his firearms so mom didn’t get herself or dad in trouble by finding any the guns. Now she is in memory care/hospice, my dad in assisted living. The firearms remain in the family safely locked away.
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@Donald378 Welcome to the community!
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My 90 year old uncle passed last year. He wouldn’t let anyone drive him around and I can’t drive because of epilepsy. He scared the holy crap out of me a few times. My 84 years old mom is starting to run red lights. Sigh….
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Geez I know how that feels to see the accident in waiting drive off into the sunset after trying to take the keys away.
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I know some day it will be my turn to turn over the keys and carry permit
with previous injury’s hopefully not sooner but later
ill get even wen he asks what is in the ‘‘home loads’’
geeze I don’t remember 
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I’m my moms sole caretaker now she’s 88 and can no longer walk on her own, I’m glad I’m medically retired because cooking for her and taking care of the pets and a 70 yr old house is a 24/7 job. She’s 88 and that’s why I live in town now and can’t hardly go shoot anymore , there’s no one left as everyone has passed away but I can’t and won’t complain because I had great parents.
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Dad has passed and her side, the women live until about 100 or more. My parents are/were awesome as well.
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@William191 , yea mine like yours were old school, knew how to spend money and never waste any of it and many other things for instance I nor my brothers and sisters have never seen our parents argue but I know they did because we didn’t have a lot of money but they made sure we got everything we needed . But my Dad started sell ing cars and he had a knack for it like no one else and in probably ten or so years he was on the nations top 50 car salesmen and there’s a lot of car salesmen in this country to. Back in the mid 70s he was making 80-K a year and back then that was some cheese especially for a car salesman! He worked at a Cadillac and Oldsmobile dealership and the managers would get so mad at him because he wouldn’t take a managers job and he’d be like “ H311 no why would I take such a pay cut?!” But they wouldn’t dare mess with him about it because they wouldn’t take a chance in losing him because he could work anywhere. We was on our way to New Orleans for vacation to see my moms family and he sold a car at the Atlanta airport! It was pretty good back then.
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Oh yea I was gonna say my Dad came up real poor and he said he never had a pair of shoes or long pants until he got drafted lol. His Dad my Grandfather grew up on a Reservation and is 100% Cherokee and didn’t like to talk about it to any of us kids but my grandma said it was because it wasn’t very good because he had to eat dogs and cats and anything else they could catch or kill , and man he was a hella hunter believe me.
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We are those aging parents. Mid 80’s but still in decent shape. We are now the oldest couple in our neighborhood. I really have to thin the herd but not really wanting to. I have gifted quite a few guns to kids and grandkids. Trying to figure out what to cut when I see some I would like to buy. Prefer 7.62x39 to 5.56x45 but the 7.62x39 is what I should cut. Weight is becoming a problem. Wife can no longer handle more than 22lr and can not pull a double action trigger. 12 gauge is not fun. I will get to the point When I have to give up but not yet.
Son is visiting this Christmas and wondering what to send back with him. Pre inheritance.
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I was thinking of one more rifle, AR-15 style. I mean what can I do with it besides pass it on unless the SHTF. My son isn’t interested in guns. Might as well live well and help others that need it.
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