As a father, that would have me in tears. I would be so proud, and happy for my child to say that to me.
5 Likes
Keep on livin’ my friend.
Part of the cycle of life is caring for aging parents and spouses. My father – a Korean war combat vet – lived to be 86 and late in his life suffered from dementia that ran in his family. My mother lived to be 92.
Years ago, my dad bought a .25 caliber baby Browning to slip in his pocket when he and my mom took trips to Las Vegas after an incident where they had been confronted by low-lifes in a casino elevator. It was mostly for show. Long after those days were behind him, I found the pistol in his stuff and asked him to show me how it operated. He dropped cartridges in the magazine well and was baffled by how it might work. My mom put her finger in the trigger guard on the trigger in a failed effort to pull the slide back to prove to me that she still had it. I took the gun out of the house.
Caring for aging parents is much more than self-defense and safety stuff. For me, it involved a lot of personal hygiene activities that I never imagined I would be doing as an adult for my mom and dad on top of house/yard maintenance, meals, doctors, driving, clearing out accumulated clutter, dealing with mail and phone scammers who prey on the elderly, etc.
Virtually everyone makes a promise to their spouse that they will never put them in a nursing home. That promise is almost always broken at some point when in-home elder care becomes infeasible. Maybe the best thing you can do for/with your parents to is to have a frank discussion about end-of-life issues.
2 Likes
Well said Mark697.
I had similar experience personally, and part of my day to day occupation is working with these families.
What stood out the most from your comment were all the many other things just as important or more.
I not trying to normalize it, but you put it in perspective, and tastefully so.
Many of us will also one day be those elderly in need.
2 Likes
Thanks for the kind words. Those are in short supply these days.
2 Likes
It’s sad to think though that our parents work their whole lives, build up a legacy for their children to inherit. Then when the children can’t or are unable to see to their parents needs have to sell the house, give away all the savings to a care facility. Starting prices are around $2k a month plus. If you’re lucky enough you get to inherit but then you get taxed for what you inherit that has already been taxed.
1 Like
Two words for everyone
Estate Trust.
3 Likes
Both of my in-laws past this last year (January 2024 & September 2024). My wife and bonus daughter moved in with them in 2019 when it became clear they needed someone over night in addition to a hired caregiver during the day. I started courting my wife in 2020, marrying her in January of 2021 and moving in at that point.
Firearms were not a part of my in-law’s life, which made it easy in this regard … but it was a struggle for my wife when driving was no longer a privilege: dad driving the car through the neighbor’s yard because the driveway “was blocked”, taking the crowbar and power drill to the filing cabinet the keys were locked in… it eventually took the cognitive driving test to be completed and discussing the results with an officer for dad to ultimately give up driving (and a driving caregiver soon became the alternative).
For mom, my wife asked general questions to dad’s DR at visits with the family and allowing dad’s DR to be the bad guy:
= = = “so, Dr Doctor, how often do you think people should shower?” Well, I feel everyone should have at lest two or three showers a week. later at home “Well mom, you heard Dr Doctor, at least two showers a week, it’s Friday so let’s get one in this week and we can shower again on Tuesday.”
For my in-laws, it was a little bit more economical to Privately Hire “household employee” caregivers ($18-$25 / hour) than to have a care company ($30-$35 / hour who only paid their caregivers $15-$18 / hour). And for those we paid as W-2 employees, we noticed they stayed around much longer than 1099 employees. BUT we were consistently getting in-patient care facility quotes in the range of $6k-$10k per month!
-* - * - * - * - * - * - * - * -
Slowly working towards this conversation with my parents, who are younger, but still don’t trust my mom or sister with firearms for assorted reasons while my mom insists they need their firearms (which are safely secured in the family safe).
3 Likes
One of my wife’s nephews insinuated she was getting too old to do anything so we sent him some pictures. She will be 87 next month and our 59th anniversary was yesterday.
9 Likes
Seems like no matter what caliber it is ain’t nothing heavier than ammo huh ?
1 Like