Babylon bee is at it again

Wii-B that’s Tight just one little problem my taxes are paid .!! And my Little bit of America :united_states: is not for sale . And when my Debbie Ann and MoMA is gone , !! He can have it !!! And he doesn’t need to wait to Long kaz we are all so injured or cancer that who gives a SHiiTT about this madness and Terrible evilness !! We sure don’t .!! That said we will pass when the GREAT SPIRIT SAYS NOT ELON MUSK!!! Kaz not for sale was what the native people said and they we had a war Before we lost our freedom country and so it’l goes !! Now Americans will have to truly Fight for their country and Land grate POST SO MY Brother !! It Looks Like if anyone is under Forty !! They Better straighten up their country Kaz HELLS COMING. Believe me . It’s a war. From HELL . My Brother sir , I hope we miss IT. If not. I will pro tis a patat!! That word for here an.CENTER. Start. With MY AZZ kaz !! I’m the front Line !! Bobby Jean Twofeathers. Sir my Land is not worth what it’s going to cost !! . To me all I can give my LIFE !! Love ya Brother will-my Brother Sir. No sale. :latin_cross::chile::united_states::owl::feather::feather: GOD BLESS US ALL :heart::white_heart::blue_heart::chile::united_states::dizzy::high_voltage::sparkles::hot_face::owl::eagle:NO .SALE​:double_exclamation_mark::double_exclamation_mark::double_exclamation_mark::owl::feather::feather::sparkles::sparkles::sparkles::sparkles::sparkles::sparkles::sparkles::sparkles::sparkles::sparkles::sparkles:

There are a lot of religions out there, but only one can be the religion of peace. How can you be sure you’re on the right path?

Here are 9 signs you belong to the true religion of peace:


  1. You always proclaim “God is great” before stabbing someone: No one else is that committed to peace.

  2. Everyone, regardless of creed, is invited to your 9/11 party: Peaceful AND inclusive.

  3. You always give people a chance to convert before killing them: Incredibly thoughtful.

  4. The guy who started your religion only executed 700 people or so: Hard to get more nonviolent than that.

  5. You run to your underground bunker every time you hear thunder: Force of habit.

  6. Many of your favorite phrases begin with “Death to ____”: It’s an exciting way to start a sentence.

  7. You have a hard time not steering your vehicle into a crowd of pedestrians: So tempting.

  8. You never miss an episode of The Tucker Carlson Show: That guy really speaks your language.

  9. The people who say you aren’t the religion of peace have been murdered: All doubts erased.


Brother Cal where do ya get this SHiiTT from my god man lol :joy: my eyes my eyes lol wtf :flushed_face: lol :joy:

  1. Inject them with the COVID-19 vaccine: Slow, but foolproof.

  2. Take them to the set of an Alec Baldwin movie: They can even operate a camera before the end comes.

  3. Hand them a nice cartoon of the prophet Mohammed and drop them in London: Done and done.

  4. Give a bunch of people rifles and put them in a line facing the criminal and then have them all shoot their guns at once: We could call it, and we’re just spitballing here, “a firing squad.”

  5. Place them between JB Pritzker and a hamburger: Oof. What a way to go.

  6. Call Texas: They seem to have it figured out.

  7. Disguise them as Caitlin Clark and put them in a WNBA game: Decapitation guaranteed.

  8. Lock them in a room with a TV that plays nothing but an endless loop of The View: Cruel and unusual, but effective.

  9. Give the criminal dirt on Hillary Clinton: Sayonara, criminal.

  10. Just get a dude to do it: Let’s be honest.



U.S. - A new climate model shows that much of southern California will be underwater in the future as a result of uninhibited climate change. These stark images have had a profound effect on public opinion, causing a huge spike in support for climate change.

“You mean, just by driving around in my gas guzzler, I could flood all the homes of those coastal elites?” asked Greg Butler, who lives in rural Kansas. “Cool! Why am I still talking to you? I should be driving!”

“I don’t even believe in climate change,” said Evelyn Klein of Boise, Idaho, “but now I hope it’s real. So what do I do to help it along? Eat more meat? I can do that!”

This pro-climate-change attitude has alarmed many rich, left-wing Californians. “You stupid redneck hicks,” said Hollywood producer Alan Stevenson. “Don’t you understand? You all need to make huge, personal sacrifices or my beachfront property is ruined!”

Still, in middle America, there is a newfound vigor for helping climate change, with everyone trying to do their part. And if someone doesn’t have the time or ability to add to climate change, they can now buy carbon credits - money that goes toward people cutting down trees to help add more carbon to the air.

“You mean, just by driving around in my gas guzzler, I could flood all the homes of those coastal elites?” asked Greg Butler, who lives in rural Kansas. “Cool! Why am I still talking to you? I should be driving!”

ROFLMAOSmiley7