A young married couple are buying their first house together and the mortgage broker has offered them mutual life insurance polices.
What’s this, says the wife.
Husband: oh it’s nothing really, we pay twenty quid a month and if one of us dies for whatever reason then the mortgage gets paid off in full. It’s quite a common policy.
Wife: so if I die you get the house mortgage free?
Husband: yes, and of course vice versa, if I die you get it mortgage free.
Wife, never mind that, if I die, you get the house. and then what, would you re-marry?
Husband: well that’s very hypothetical question, but I’m still a young man so I guess so.
Wife would you move your new bride into our house?
Husband: well it would be fully paid off, and it’s a very nice house, so that would seem sensible.
Wife (through gritted teeth): Would you and your new bride sleep in our marital bed?
Husband: well it is an orthopaedic mattress and you know I have a bad back, so yes definitely.
Wife (now getting visibly angry): would you let her drive my car?
Husband: well I suppose so, otherwise it would just be sat there on the drive doing nothing.
Wife (now absolutely furious) : Huhh, I suppose you would also let her use my golf clubs?
Husband: Certainly not! She’s left handed.