Anyone can type “LoL” “OMG” and fake it, many do! It is hard to suppress a face to face, eye to eye response. That’s why at work I choose to get off my Ass and go over to someone’s desk to discuss certain things. This way, I can actually see the individual and really gage how well they are doing and if they can spare the time engage me with their full attention. BTW, many times it is nothing more than a Good Morning and let’s go for a coffee or quick walk about as you seem to need a break. Let’s talk non-business to put you in a better place.
I think this is very important. I always hated phone interviews because I could never truly tell if the person was understanding what I was saying or how they felt about it based on words or tone of voice alone. Video chats might make up for this a little bit but I still find it very difficult to pick up on subtle cues from a screen image and staring into a camera just isn’t the same as looking directly into someone’s eyes as well as being able to see their entire body language. I also feel that people, including myself, behave differently when staring at a screen vs true face to face.
I agree that seeing and mostly trying to focus on the good is very important. Though if you get too caught up in the pretty scenery and don’t focus on the dangers at your feet you risk walking off a cliff.
I once had an Iroquois medicine man tell me that I would have a very hard life because I see the world the way it should be and will never be satisfied with the way it is. He has been mostly right though his words have helped me to not get so caught up in how far we are from the ideal that I don’t focus my efforts on simply dealing with the messy reality that surrounds us as best as I can.
You are raising a smart, thinking young man. Good job Dad.
Seems to be a sign of our troubled times.
The first line of defense against school vilance is communication with the people in their lives that matter most. There is a history of students or other people putting their intentions online. Before it is done we have to look for the warning signs. I have worked in school safety for 27 years in Wisconsin. I spend a lot of time getting to know students and developing reports with them. I can see and understand the students that don’t have the attention needed from the people that should matter most in their life. Being a good role model and just listening to their point of view and explaining things from another (adult) point of view sometimes makes all the difference in a person’s life.
Chemical inbalance is one thing but learning from your mistakes as a young person is another issue. People sometimes make mistakes and learn from them and become better people that have learned from their mistakes. A lot of young people are sometimes misdiagnosed because it might be an emotional issue or a traumatic issue versus a chemical inbalance.
Each can cause the other. But meds aren’t always necessary to correct chemical imbalance. The brain is an interesting thing - it’s the one organ in the body that changes just based on how we THINK. Changes in the brain, in turn, effect the rest of the body. Quite fascinating.
In any case, unhealthy messages when we are young can form unhealthy brain chemistry and structural changes in the brain that can become permanent. Even then, we can unlearn past negative narratives and learn more positive, healthy perspectives. And with all that, brain chemistry can change.
The negative messages we are sending everyone these days unsurprisingly leads to chemical imbalance. Meds and replacement narratives can turn it around.
I couldn’t have said it better you are spot on. Each young person is a person unto themselves. The support systems in place help determine the outcome with everyone involved.
The Body Keeps The Score
That is why I like EMDR so much.
Many answers on this topic have increased my fear of the future of American gun owners. This community was designed for topics such as this one, but “reasons” greatly vary.
Narrowing down and discovering the specific reason for a person to commit any act of terror is baffling to the majority of humanity. Experts such as @Scott361 spend life long careers studying human behavior. With so much need of understanding triggers that produce a tendency of behavior resulting in the harm of others must be individually viewed. For example, each doctor’s patients are not going to produce every symptom which an illness may produce. Therefore, patients (a) may not ever trigger a desire to harm a person wherefore, patient (b) has been violent for a long period of time.
In addition, further restriction of a persons right to purchase firearms only further advances oppertunity for mass shooters.
I don’t believe you can slap a label on any of it. In some cases it could be just the need of attention, however that may come. Some would be just pure evil thoughts and these people are out there at any age they simply want to watch it all burn. The lack of respect for one another. The who cares of your problems i have my own. The lack of treasuring life itself. What has changed in our society the most is just the lack of empathy to be able to put yourself in someone’s shoes and feel their pain instead of saying oh suck it up,some people don’t have the ability to just suck it up and move on without help. Life is hard each person out there walk through this world and at times trips I’m over 50 now and bullying hasn’t changed and it never will. Some just have to make other feel bad to feel good or fit in with the crowd. To be honest i really don’t know where we went wrong but boy did we. So to end this book im going to say stop watching and saying look. Teach good values and a respect for all life and each other it really is that simple. Stop looking for the hidden devil and do what you can and that is all you can do who knows how far a smile and hello can go in someone else misery.
Do you happen to have the original source of what you quoted? I am curious where it came from.
Dave / Believer45
Hello and welcome @Believer45
Respectfully, I’ll beg to differ. Not only does it have something to do with social change; it is in itself an agent for social change. It has changed how we as a society communicate, in large part; it has changed what information and types of information we share; it has changed how we relate to one another in the most common of ways.
I can even understand how you might disagree. You grew up in a state of what I call: “instant immersion.” You grew up where the things we are discussing was already your reality and you grew into it. So, for you there’s no problem, and because of that you are unable to appreciate the depth and breadth of intent shared by those who were here before you. This is not a negative, it’s just the way it is.
For instance: You cannot fathom having to get up from you couch to turn the TV Channel or having to adjust the rabbit ear antenna or put aluminum foil on the tips or tell your child to stand next to it in order to get a clear signal. You cannot fathom the thought that TV actually used go off at a certain time. You cannot fathom having to be stationed at one location in the house in order to talk on the telephone. You cannot not fathom someone trying to call you and get a busy signal and have to hang up and call back later. You cannot, in a practical way, appreciate having to actually walk, catch the bus, or taxi, or drive to the stores to shop (for anything), these things and others were not your reality, today you press an icon on your phone to an app, so it is understood that you have no appreciation for them because they are unfamiliar to you, and you probably had no experience with them. So, it’s understood. This is not your fault; you were not here yet. You only hear the stories of the way it used to be and it’s a challenge to process this in your mind and appreciate it because you have no connection to it.
Now, I’m not that much older than you (I was just 19 last week–or so it seems), but to you I may be ancient. It goes fast! @Forensic_Wow; it goes fast. But you will soon see, because time waits on no one, and it won’t be long before you’ll be sharing “the way it was” with someone that’s going to present themselves as having “something to add to the conversation” while still in their diaper–in comparison.
I don’t despise the past, because it taught us a lot. Basic fundamentals were forged into us because everything was fully articulated and rudimentary. We even hoped for a day when things would be easier, and without so much manual manipulation. And while it seems to have taken its sweet time coming, it showed up suddenly, and then it mushroomed into what we have today! And by comparison, when you showed up, you were instantly immersed in today’s progress, because that is the state of things and the course of life today! Cellphones rule! Without a smartphone you’re out of touch or greatly disadvantaged, unprepared to deal with the realities of today! And it will continue…because we evolve.
Social media on its face is the result of forward thinking with great intentions. The threat to social media, however, is nefarious opportunism. There’s always some element in society that will pervert what was intended for the good of all. But there should be caveat. The caveat should be “never lose the basic rudiments.” Because things can change. Never lose knowing how to do things manually or get along without electronic devices of any sort. That possibility is a threat to people of your generation, because you can’t fathom it as a possibility. Which also means that people your senior is a true treasure for you! So, don’t be disrespectful. You need what they know! Why? Because it’s helpful.
Social media has changed how we as a people communicate, how we process information, how we share information, how we think, how we identify, how appraise ourselves, what gives us validation, and/or how we validate and authenticate ourselves. Social media is now both a lens and a filter, and it has changed how we as a society, in large part, related to one another. Just consider how we are communicating right now! lol. I can type the wrong thing the wrong way and you might attach the wrong emotions to it that could impact your behavior or regard toward others, me, your parents, or even the world. All one needs is a few hundred clicks in agreement and it’s a new law, and super quick! Long standing organizations have plummeted before the day is done because of social media. It can be good if used wisely and constructively. But it can also be bad if handled carelessly, callously, and cruelly.
I remember when bringing a calculator to school got you expelled for cheating. Just having it! That’s how old I am. Today, if doing long division with pencil and paper was a prerequisite for graduation from High School, the rate of graduation would be very, very small.
Social media has tentacles that touch every aspect of our lives. What we do with it and how we use it will determine our success or failure. And that jury is still out. Because there were other factors that led to where we are today as it pertains and not all are good. But suffice it say, social media has a great deal to do with social change. JMHO And I will make a change and stop sermonizing on this platform. Geeeez this was long, and it didn’t take that long. lol. But much respect to and for you, sir.
That couldn’t be further off the mark. Sorry. You need to listen to some current intellectuals. Try Jordan Peterson to start.
We were raised on a remote ranch way up on the mountain, we took days off to cut hay, gather cattle, hunt deer… It wasn’t until I was 9 or 10 that I actually met a black person, in person. Imagine growing up not knowing or seeing what New York City looked like, what packed neighborhoods looked like, what stylish clothes looked like, what same sex anything looked like. Our best friends where dogs and horses, that’s who we talked to. But today all of those things are everywhere, on your cell phone, on billboards, on TV. Kids see it, they learn it and they react to it.
Exactly! So, in point of FACT, it influenced social change.
Further, imagine someone that is accustomed to seeing and interacting with a melting pot of ethnicity, and then go to a place where your ethnicity is not or rarely encountered, and if so, only from a far, and then have them ask you, “does your color rub off?”
Imagine, next, how the perception changes after sitting a while and having shared similar experiences only to find out how much the two had in common,
When I got to permanent duty in Europe I was in a barracks room with a kid from Chicago. He had grown up almost exactly like me, interacting with people of similar ethnicity. All I can say is this kid from the Northern Utah Mountains learned a whole whole whole lot from a kid from Cabrini Green.