Well, I can’t really say 45 is not for her. I tried to tell people that a gun is up to the person who holds it, how comfortable it feels in their hand. One gun for you may not feel good to another. With that being said I think she need to go to a range that Sells, Has a range that allows you to rent their guns. She needs to pick up many guns to feel how comfortable they are to her.
Then she needs to take those guns, and fire them.
She may wanna 45, but that may be too strong when she shoots it, or she may love it.
I took my wife shopping for her firearm and they wanted to give her a 45 which I was completely against. She fired my Glock 19 once and felt that it was kind of overpowering for her but a 45 Would be way too much. She did settle on a Smith and Wesson LD9 which I think is still too big for her hand but she liked it.
Maybe ask her why she wants a 45 before trying to move her in another direction. This little woman can shoot a 45, and expect your mom can too, if she wants. Go shooting with her, let her try on some different guns and see what fits before trying to direct her one way or the other. If your favorite range is closed, maybe set up something with friends (who are down with helping out Mom) in the country.
You go Mom and you can get a simple 45 that you can handle. Just suggesting a compact 45 the shield 45 but make sure you practice with it. I advice this because her heart is already set on the 45 but I say to stay away from the 1911 type format.
If her heart is set on a 45 and she doesnt plan to conceal it, check out an FNX 45. They shoot ‘real nice’ and if she has no arthritis or other issues that could make any firearm an issue, I see no reason she couldn’t ‘handle it’ .
KCMO is my hometown and still live here(well, a bit south of the city proper but close enough). If she has the ablility to visit, frontier justice is a great place to check out guns and rent them. They are owned by a husband and wife and have made an effort to make the store very friendly to female buyers. My wife loves them because she can also shop at the boutique while there. They have the original location out in Lee’s Summit or a second location out on State Ave by the nascar track. She can rent and shoot in the same building. Try several and see what she likes best. They offer lots of great classes as well.
My young teens had no problems shooting my 1911.
I’d ask her if she’s ever shot a .45 before.
The answer might surprise you.
Of course she might have developed arthritis or other condition that would make shooting a .45 more difficult, so take her to a range with rentals and let her decide which she enjoys shooting.
A lot of ladies have difficulty with the racking of the slide rather than the recoil. Due to the spring weight 20-22#. If manipulation is not a problem, by all means get a nice 45ACP.
If manipulation is a concern especially in a high stress situation, stick with 1911 style 9mm. 9mm has come a long way.
As soon as my hands can’t handle my 45’s they will have to be ripped from my hands, then I’ll get the 9mm under severe protest, I might have to go looting.
I would not recommend .45 for a first gun. It’s expensive, and it does have more recoil…I would recommend 9mm
BUT .45 really isn’t that bad. I carry a shield .45, my brother has shot it and he managed it fine (he does not own handguns). .45 has become my favorite round. Even thought it packs a bigger punch, it’s oddly predictable and comfortable to me. I would definitely shoot a .45 before buying it as my first gun though.
Here is what I did with my mom when she wanted to buy a handgun.
Wait until she can rent a handgun and try one before she buys it. Take her to a gun range and rent two or three handguns for her and 50 rounds for each gun. Have her shoot all three and see which one she is most comfortable with.
My mom could not rack the slide on a lot of handguns because of limited hand strength and her age. So she almost waisted a bunch of money on a gun she could not use. This is the biggest reason why I say try before you buy.
If she wants a 45 then rent her a 45 but also rent a 9 mm .
But honestly my biggest piece of advice try before you buy even if it means you have to wait.
My first pistol was a 1911. It’s still my favourite to shoot. I could shoot it all day, but my wife shot it once and hated it. On the other hand, she likes her 9mm, but it starts to iterate me after 50 rounds. I guess one size doesn’t fit all.