@Dan51 welcome aboard! Did 24 in the Navy brother.
You have a fairly extensive list of limitations. To that end I would be looking at mid size revolvers that will provide you a “hand filling experience” which will compensate to some degree for your loss of hand strength. As far as revolvers go I am fond of the Ruger Security or speed Six or even a GP-1000 as a mid size hand filling revolver.
I have never taken a shine to S&W as I always thought there was too much going on inside. Colt’s are a bit spendy.
The problem with low weight is that the recoil becomes unbearable. It is better to have a heavier gun that fills your hand and allows you to use arm strength in CONJUNCTION with your hands. Trigger pull obviously can be adjusted from heavy to nothing. Trigger Shoes, (I think they still make them) can be added to multiply trigger finger pressure across a wider plane.
You may find a heavier GP-100 in a 2 or 4" barrel loaded with 38 SPCL or +P+ or even 357 Magnum may be your hot ticket as it is a bit heavy to reduce recoil, fills your hand better than a “Saturday night special” and offers you more “ooomphff” than a 32. When it comes down to it, you will only need one or two rounds a cylinder offers you the ability to select your statement.
Revolvers aside there are a few new pistola’s out there that are built to address low “racking” pressure in 9mm and 380 but I am not very familiar with them, something about “EZ”. I’m learning though because my wife is now interested and she has poor hand strength. She was able to successfully rack a Sig 365 (I think) which the gun monger reported as one of the “stiffer” auto’s. She CAN NOT rack my EDC 1911 Officers Model in her current condition with two shoulder injuries.
Your options may be more varied than you give yourself credit for. A hand filling 9mm/380/40S&W auto w/ a shorter barrel may be better than the long double action pull of a revolver.