You are losing me. You do realize it’s the Babylon B.
LOS ANGELES, CA — The California state government is once again under fire after the revelation that it issued a Commercial Driver’s License to famed blind pianist Stevie Wonder.
Wonder was reportedly issued the CDL due to his status as visually disabled, as the California legislature had passed a law to combat the under-representation of blind people among truck drivers.
“Look at me, I’m driving a big rig!” said Wonder, flashing his signature smile. “Never thought this day would come. I just walked in the office and said, ‘Can a brother get a CDL?’ As soon as they saw I was blind, they hooked me up. Let’s load up and hit the road!”
Wonder was seen driving a large 18-wheeler semi-truck along the 405 in downtown Los Angeles over the weekend. Witnesses report seeing him bump into cement barriers and run over traffic cones as he barreled down the wrong side of the freeway, happily singing a tune. The joyride ended when Wonder plowed the truck through a taco stand and then into a motel. However, Wonder has remained undeterred and stated that he looks forward to getting back on the road soon.
“In the state of California, we believe a CDL is a natural human right and everyone who wants one should get one,” Governor Gavin Newsom said in a statement. “We will never let anything, not even blindness, stand in the way of someone fulfilling their dream of being a big rig driver. That’s the America I want to leave for my children.”
At publishing time, Wonder had been seen driving his big rig down Santa Cruz beach and into the Pacific Ocean.
Would be typical of California-cation if this were not a parody.
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**“Which lane is for passing?”:**Any true American will know this.
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“Do you return grocery carts to the corral?”: The United States is a civilized nation ruled by laws and human decency.
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“Which actor famously broke his toe during filming of The Two Towers?”: Anyone who doesn’t know this has no business choosing the country’s leaders.
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“How many Communists have you punched?”: Only numbers greater than 0 are acceptable.
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“Did Han shoot first?”: People who revise history must never vote.
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“You’re in a desert, walking along, when you look down and see a tortoise. It’s crawling toward you. You reach down and flip it over on its back, its belly baking in the hot sun, beating its legs trying to turn itself over. But it can’t. Not without your help. But you’re not helping. Why is that?”: Have to weed out the replicants.
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“Are you now or have you ever been deceased?”: This will also determine your party registration.
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“Name one country greater than America.”: If any answer is given, they fail.
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“What is a woman?”: A “Phone a Friend” option to call Matt Walsh is not allowed.
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“What country are you a citizen of?”: If the answer is “Somalia,” they are only allowed to vote in Minnesota.
Robert 1246 here’s ya A Root Beer
sir for Being Lost Sir no one is Losing you north east south west. Their all Better Sir Stay Sharp lol Love Bobby Jean and Debbie ann ![]()
Sir
Don102 Sir i think Gavingrusum is The same as pucken just more friendly with how insane he is they should get a room they are Both evil and Dicktaters. Thank you for your service Brother Sir Heres ya a Root Beer
Sir. Stay Sharp . Sir Love Bobby Jean and Debbie ann ![]()
Sir ps we know who would be da Bitch if they got a Room newsoon.
10 Ways Babies Are Smarter Than Liberals (Only 10?)
While babies are undeniably cute, they aren’t too bright. Yet, despite being unable to talk or poo on a potty, babies are still significantly smarter than today’s liberals. Here are ten ways babies are outpacing the libs:
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They instinctively know only mommy has breasts: First point goes to the babies.
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They firmly refused to wear government-mandated face masks: Babies follow the science.
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Babies know that a grown man falling up the stairs of Air Force One is really funny and want to see it again and again: Adorable and smart.
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They do not eat kale: Only dumb libs eat kale. Babies win again.
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A baby has never said, “True communism has never been tried.”: Their brilliance towers over the poor liberals.
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Babies do not enact segregation based on skin color: Another loss for the libs.
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They have never once voted to limit Second Amendment rights: Yet again, babies come out on top.
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Babies poop themselves, but don’t try to pretend like they didn’t: You weren’t fooling anyone, Joe.
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Babies have never raised your taxes: They understand that taxation is theft.
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Babies somehow know abortion is wrong: Wow. Babies are just running the table here.
And the final tally is: Babies 10, Liberals 0. Congratulations, babies.
Even those poopy diapers are smarter than liberal demoncrats.![]()
Sage sayings about Politicians:
“Politics: Strife of interests masquerading as a contest of principles.” – Ambrose Bierce
“Ninety percent of the politicians give the other ten percent a bad reputation.” – Henry Kissinger
“This country has come to feel the same when Congress is in session as when the baby gets hold of a hammer.” – Will Rogers
“Democracy substitutes election by the incompetent many for appointment by the corrupt few.” – George Bernard Shaw
“To my mind Judas Iscariot was nothing but a low, mean, premature Congressman.” – Mark Twain
“I think I can say, and say with pride, that we have some legislatures that bring higher prices than any in the world.” – Mark Twain
“Every election is a sort of advance auction of stolen goods.” – H.L. Mencken
“The whole aim of practical politics is to keep the populace alarmed (and hence clamorous to be led to safety) by menacing it with an endless series of hobgoblins, all of them imaginary.” – H.L. Mencken
“Laws are spider webs through which the big flies pass and the little ones get caught.” – Honore De Balzac
“It is inaccurate to say I hate everything. I am strongly in favor of common sense, common honesty and common decency. This makes me forever ineligible for public office.” – H.L. Mencken
“So … I became a newspaperman. I hated to do it but I couldn’t find honest employment.” – Mark Twain
“Standing in the middle of the road is very dangerous; you get knocked down by the traffic from both sides,” – Margaret Thatcher
“An appeaser is one who feeds a crocodile – hoping it will eat him last.” – Winston Churchill
“Just because the water is quiet does not mean the crocodiles are gone.” – Old Malay proverb
“Any man who is under 30, and is not a liberal, has no heart; and any man who is over 30, and is not a conservative, has no brains.” – Winston Churchill
Kamala Harris Last Seen Fleeing Dozens Of International Assassins After Trump Cancels Her Secret Service Protection
U.S.·Aug 29, 2025 · BabylonBee.com
LOS ANGELOS, CA — Following President Trump’s recent cancellation of Kamala Harris’ Secret Service protection, the former Vice-President was seen fleeing dozens of international assassins.
The last-captured video footage of the former VP shows Harris leaping from roof to roof in downtown LA, hotly pursued by a crowd of ninjas, men in suits wearing sunglasses, and other assailants from every corner of the world.
“It’s very sad to see what’s happening now that she lost her Secret Service protection, but she’s doing all right for herself,” said Grayson Casey, the intelligence operative who was the last to see Harris in the flesh. “She’s actually got some impressive evasion skills for such an idiotic moron. I couldn’t believe it when she broke the fall from a 5-story building with a sweet Gramby roll.”
Reports state that, in the absence of her government protection, Harris has thus far fended off elite covert attacks, including a poisonous slug which she killed with a lightsaber, a time pincer movement using the Algorithm, and an amnesiac recovered from the middle of the ocean.
Doug Emhoff, Kamala’s husband, declined to comment, as he was too busy cheering on the assassins pursuing his wife.
At publishing time, Harris had finally been caught by the band of international assassins after she crashed into a tunnel, which they had painted on the side of a building with the words “Tunnel to Safety.”
‘‘MEEP MEEP!’’
Speaking of being chased…
…Was that a ‘FOOD TRUCK’ wiz by in dat Motorxade? Man, VP Vance has EVERYTHING!![]()
This is clearly fake news! Not a single attacker fought off with a Venn diagram? She didn’t toss anyone from a coconut tree or beat them with a salad spinner? #FakeNews
Ironic that one “protestor” apparently is pro Trump/Vance holding a sign celebrating the Republican victory with a sign stating “Freedom not Fascism”. She seems to understand what the Democrats are up to.
Do they even know what they say and write means? ![]()
UM…. It was Da Bee My Friend!
‘Buzz Buzz!’ ![]()
I gather the Venn diagram bit buzzed right past you, my friend (meant in a good way, of course). ![]()






